"All you have to do is pay your taxes, remember I am God, pay your taxes, pray to Allah, pay more taxes, and vote for me as much as possible. Oh yeah, Pay more taxes wherever you go.
So, do you really think that "coming out" in support of gay marriage will help you carry North Carolina in November? Yes, you are as stupid as you look!
"Just order like Michelle orders, one of everything…for starters, then reorder everything you've liked all over again. It's ok, we charge it to the taxpayers like you"
Michelle – My hemorrhoids are killin me.
White Lady – Michelle looks like her hemorrhoids are killing her.
White Man – Gosh – makes me cringe when I think Michelle has hemorrhoids.
Barack – I I I bet Michelle's hemorrhoids are are killin her!
Why do we get peanut butter and jelly with glasses of tap water while the two of you get caviar, prime rib, organic seasonal salads, and a bottle of Domaine de la Romanée-Conti 1997?
Michelle – Who straightens this girls hair?
White Girl – Where do you buy your wigs?
Obama – We got the white vote last time!
White Man – This is embarrassing!
Michelle – She better vote for my man!
White Girl – What do we get for going Socialist?
Obama – What ya say Larry, it's only 4 more years?
White Guy – Line 75,357 is buried in fine print Barry!
Michelle: I've already ordered what I want you to have for dinner. Oh, and don't even think about ordering dessert. I have the food police watching you!
Michelle thought bubble: When I told them no fat people for this photo-op didn't they understand I meant no white folks, either? Do I have to spell out EVERYTHING?
"Don't be afraid to try the canine cuisine at this joint, Greg. It's not bad if they BBQ it and serve it up with a side of those little seasoned curly fries!"
"Just between you and us, this whole organic gardening thing is nothing but a big PR scam! All the work is done by illegal immigrants from Honduras. Michelle couldn't grow a Chia Pet if you Gorilla-glued the instructions to her forehead!"
Culture war?! Hey whitey my people been humpin on the dance floor for thousands of years!
Yea! And we whiteys stopped that about the time the wheel was invented!
I can't believe this bitch has the nerve to tell my husband he's NOT God!
Next term if he's re-elected this is all the food you'll havem money for when we're done taxing you.
Michelle thinking she's superior to the "white bitch", while Barry checks out the hubby.
What do you and the first lady recommend for desert? The labrador cobbler or the pug a la mode?
No need to bring out any food…listening to you and Barack talk has caused me to lost my appetite.
^^^ Edit
Next term if he's re-elected this is all the food you'll have money for when we're done taxing you.
"We lived in a beautiful house before you became president. Now we live in this cave."
Your policies have put us and the next 100 generations into debt to China. What do you have to say to that?
As white taxpayers, you do realize you're pay for this meal.
" With a shovel-ready job, you'll be able to have food on your empty plates "
"When Michelle is done eating, there will be enough scraps left for all of us to eat"
"When the food arrives, watch out for Michelle's flyin' elbows"
"Is the stripper male or female tonight?"
"All you have to do is pay your taxes, remember I am God, pay your taxes, pray to Allah, pay more taxes, and vote for me as much as possible. Oh yeah, Pay more taxes wherever you go.
Damn I ordered the Arugula salad trying to impress the 1st Diva and this chick ordered the Philly Cheesesteak and Jalepeno Poppers. Hmmm?
Yeah, your future, I know—–we're still taking a better paid vacation than you'll ever see.
"This our first puppy restaurant, what do you recommend, Mr President?"
"Enjoy your meal, white folks, you'll be paying for it the rest of your lives if I have a say-so"
No Mr. President, I'm sure pitbull is not one of the specials.
No we don't have tickets to the Ted Nugent conert…
I forgot my teleprompter. What am I supposed to say?
So you want us to get 50 of our dumbest friends to vote for you?
Lady in blue: "Sure we'll pay for dinner. As soon as we get our jobs back!"
"Anything but Chinese. I have a feeling, that soon, we'll all be eating Chinese for a long time."
"What do you mean you put a tax on this glass of water?"
"No you cant have your money back, you have to pay for our vacations just like every other tax payer."
Michelle prefers the poodle, I'm kinda partial to the terrier.
Michelle prefers the poodle, I'm kinda partial to the terrier.
Michelle has been barking about the shepherd pie here for weeks
God…I hate white people
Typical Obama, hiding behind Michelle.
No, you don't need those menus – Michelle is going to decide what we eat. Get used to it.
So Michelle, is it uncomfortable to sit on a butt the size of Jupiter?
So, do you really think that "coming out" in support of gay marriage will help you carry North Carolina in November? Yes, you are as stupid as you look!
Excuse me, pass the crackers, please.
Is this photo-opp over yet?
Frankly wanting to be free is not raceist.
YOU Poor Dears, YOU still belive in America.
Hope to Change that.
"Just order like Michelle orders, one of everything…for starters, then reorder everything you've liked all over again. It's ok, we charge it to the taxpayers like you"
"Read my Lips Larry, the taxpayers are picking up the tab."
Michelle – Girl I got my wig on!
Barack – Damn son, it's me and you – tonight!
Michelle – My hemorrhoids are killin me.
White Lady – Michelle looks like her hemorrhoids are killing her.
White Man – Gosh – makes me cringe when I think Michelle has hemorrhoids.
Barack – I I I bet Michelle's hemorrhoids are are killin her!
Obama, "Soon you two will have to ride at the back of the bus"
You two are way too white.
This table is too diverse.
Could you two leave?
You'll have to move. I distinctly instructed them not to seat us with any majorities.
People like you elected me, and yet I can't stand you. Weird, isn't it?
You – honky boy! Slide that ashtray down this way.
Whaddaya say, kids? Wanna give this "same-sex" thing a trial run?
Man: Who's going to leave the tip?
Obama: What the heck is a tip?
"The Lord only wants %10, the waiter wants %15 minimum, we already pay you around %25, and you want more? Are you insane?!"
So how much did you two donate?
Why do we get peanut butter and jelly with glasses of tap water while the two of you get caviar, prime rib, organic seasonal salads, and a bottle of Domaine de la Romanée-Conti 1997?
.. so do you have any more questions about our Socialist path?"
Michelle – Who straightens this girls hair?
White Girl – Where do you buy your wigs?
Obama – We got the white vote last time!
White Man – This is embarrassing!
Wig .. $500
Necktie .. $900
Lunch .. $40
Getting to first base with the white folks … PRICELESS
Michelle – She better vote for my man!
White Girl – What do we get for going Socialist?
Obama – What ya say Larry, it's only 4 more years?
White Guy – Line 75,357 is buried in fine print Barry!
Michelle: I've already ordered what I want you to have for dinner. Oh, and don't even think about ordering dessert. I have the food police watching you!
"No we haven't decided what to order yet. Our decision is still…evolving."
Yes, we have Happy Meal coupons.
Why do you ask?
What a dump. You can't even order off a teleprompter.
So will we be dining on Bulldog Briscuit, Poodle Pie, or Filet o' Shar Pei?
Look honey, more young feeble minded white liberals to exploit.
Michelle reacts to the smell of white folks.
White couple: Would it be ok if we ordered a Coke?
Michelle: Water only, you white devils! Waiter, bring me a 1954 Cabernet Burgouisse and charge it to the taxpayer!
The Republicans ate chour baby and chour grand baby!
The creatures outside looked from pig to man, and from man to pig, and from pig to man again; but already it was impossible to say which was which.
George Orwell, Animal Farm
Bitch….please
B.H.O. YOU ACTUALLY LIKE VEGTABLES? I PREFER MUTT.
Barack – What do you mean you don't have money to pay for my meal? I just created a job for you…personal maid and butler.
"We're all couples here, so tell us more about Gay Rights Mr. President!"
Grab your ankles whiteys, I'm not fooled by your apparent middle class success achieved without my help.
Which one of you is least racist?
Michelle and I are thinking you two are picture-perfect for our "get out the dumb honkie vote" campaign poster.
typo: "honky"
We think you two are picture-perfect for my "get out the dumb honky vote" campaign ads.
Obama: "Better be careful folks, Michelle looks like she's ready to cut one!"
Obama: "Food? What food? As soon as they take the pictures we're leaving. Go to McDonald's."
Michelle thought bubble: When I told them no fat people for this photo-op didn't they understand I meant no white folks, either? Do I have to spell out EVERYTHING?
So, you wouldn't mind if I took a little "executive privilege" with your girlfriend after dinner?
Let's be fair. You two still have jobs…you get the tab.
back of the bus for you honkies!!
So, if we vote for you, you'll wipe our student loan debt clean?
Just because you inherited 15 million dollars, you no longer will vote for my policies?
As the voters, you're picking up tonight's tab.
""Didn't you hear about my announcement on same-sex marriages?"
Pick out the employed taxpayers in this picture
Pick out the real racists in this picture
No cheating!
What?! You said 35 a plate. We thought that meant $35 not $35,000 a plate. But, hey, look how many people came, right?
I'm so sorry, I think Michelle forgot to use deodorant today.
No soup for you!
Oh, by the way, got any deceased relatives?
Oh, you didn't know Michelle had a sex change? I thought everyone could tell.
We're gonna find out if you're really as liberal as you think you are, cuckboy.
Hi, this is Barry and I'm Michael……..
"I can't believe you are only offering $1K for our votes"
"I gotta take a big crap… Where is the 'conservatives only' bathroom?"
dinner with idiots!
"Can you believe George Clooney and his Hollywood pals dropped doown 40K a plate to hear me give lip service to gay marriage?"
"Don't be afraid to try the canine cuisine at this joint, Greg. It's not bad if they BBQ it and serve it up with a side of those little seasoned curly fries!"
"Just between you and us, this whole organic gardening thing is nothing but a big PR scam! All the work is done by illegal immigrants from Honduras. Michelle couldn't grow a Chia Pet if you Gorilla-glued the instructions to her forehead!"
Well… I am the president of the United States and all your traditions, religion, morals and standards are going away… got it?
So… sorry but I really think its time for you to move on…
Hey man!…. Whats up with your bitch?!
Now that she's finally proud of her country, they find themselves having to sit with some of the plain folk on a "date night"
What tip?! I didn't steal any tip…
Well… we've already adopted two other abandoned democrats… I think Joe's a little too wild for us though…
THe Obamas and a real couple.
Reality meets Fantasy.
Wife Swap:
Ya Barry! Cigarettes and beer and the couch..thats all you did!
And Barry! Your wife just stayed in the bushes talking to cats..
So??!!!
Culture war?! Hey whitey my people been humpin on the dance floor for thousands of years!
Yea! And we whiteys stopped that about the time the wheel was invented!
Well my white friends… we have evolved…
Well I guess its about time… we did that many thousands of years ago…congratulations.
Wow Barry…evolved… a new big word for you? Is it a 'transparent' evolving? Because I sure can't see it..
And you believe the general black population will understand those words…'evolve' and 'forward'?
Well your last slogan 'Hope and Change' didn't work… I guess that was the 'transparent' part of your term… right?
Hey dude… I am black… why isn't your white wife drooling yet?
Please tell your wife I don't need any documents to prove anything about myself.. I am very edumacted!
Please tell your wife I don't need any documents to prove anything about myself.. I am very edumacated!
Oh….we'll win… your credit card just got maxed out…
What? You expect us to pay for your dinner too?
Wait, you mean we can only have one child? Like in China?
Let me be clear, we do have a child obesity epidemic, and children starving in the streets of America.
My tax plan is for the poor, not white people.
I'm going to eat my food then I'm going to eat your food, that's how my plan works.
What's it like being married to her, Mrs. Obama?
Why is it not OK to order Fried Chicken and greens?
Did you bring my sunglasses, Michelle? The glare off of their skin is killing my eyes.
Really,you want us to pick up the tab for this too !!!
Some blackface and a wig…you'll slip right by the Panthers manning the polls.
Yo cracker,you playing footsies with My bitch?
You were born in Hawaii? Funny you don't look Hawaiian. You look more like uh, let's say, Kenyan?
"Of my gosh, what a coincidence! I failed Government and Economics too!"
So how much longer do you two plan on being in office? We've about had it with your "Change".
Michelle & I left our credit cards at home, could you guys cover us until our giant income tax check arrives?
So how long have you two been attending this "How to be a Leader" conference?
So you smoked reefer and snorted cocaine while in school too?
Where do you keep all your white women?
Note: This line is from Blazing Saddles and I could not resist.
Do you like fat people?
…then Bill turned to Betty and said "Let's Move!"
My husband and I ordered a side of broccoli. What are you going to order as a side item-french fries?
…then I told the American people that I was born in Hawaii. The public sure is stupid…they will believe just about anything.
After we sent Joe Biden to his room we decided to eat out tonight.
So you would shoot cocaine? I always snorted it.
…so right after I shot and killed Osama Bin Laden I ordered Special Ops back into the helicopter…