Lucky the cameras are upside down otherwise people would know we're actually suspended off the ceiling.

When you are actually suspended off the ceiling it makes push-ups easier doesn't it?

Michelle, if you keep pushing like that, you'll cause an earthquake.

Please don't fall, Michelle, you'll cause an earthquake.

If you didn't eat so many burgers, you'd be able to do more than two push-ups, ma'am.

So, this is the President's answer to high gas prices?

Sorry, for some reason the mental image of a schlong just isn't working for me.

Caution, rug munchers at work.

A demonstration of how obama will be greeting our enemies if he gets another four years.

Push-ups make your arms bigger, and bigger arms make your butt look smaller…

"It's called 'exercize', Michelle… "

Now, this carpet smells fine… the one in the oval office smells like ASS!!

Now that gays are allowed in the military Ellen and Michelle prepare for the Marine Corp.

"Gee, Ellen. Are you SURE this is how lesbians do it?"

"Just pretend you're bobbing for pork chops, Michelle, and you'll do just fine."

"Keep it up, Michelle, soon you'll have enough gas to power a small car."

Yeah Ellen.. this is how my ancestors walked.

You sure I have to lick the rug, Ellen?

If this is what excercise is, we're going to have to eliminate everything that could be considered not healthy in school lunches. Out children should not have to go through this trauma to lose a little weight!

How come your doing push ups on my show, and not Oprah's?

Hey Ellen, let me show you how to do a push up. I just learned this yesterday.

If you want to be a real woman you have to look like a real woman. Do this 3 times a day for 5 minutes and your breasts will get bigger.

Demonstrating the proper way to bow to King Obama.

Yah, like that Michelle, and like I said, there's usually a woman under you.

Michelle you have to do this exercise thing…your behind is so big I'd suffocate going down if you didn't

Boot camp to be the next Lesbionic Woman

10 pushups for every 1 Oreo

"Barack said to get down and give him 20 and by gosh we're going to do it!"

Pretend there's a bucket of KFC up there and you'll be doing this in no time.

It obviously didn't work, but I tried to get Barack doing this by telling him he might still sound like a wimp-ass, but at least he wouldn't look like one.

These greenscreen boxes were a great idea Michelle.

CGI is so advanced now we don't even have to break a sweat.

Michelle does one push up, the Mainstream media video rewinds over & over to show she does 1001 and scores another World Record in one minute flat!

You should feel blessed—HE already knows how to F#@K up

Michelle wonders what prizes Ellen has for her

Yes and my children eat like this too… we are vegans…
No kidding…

A true pushup Michelle means touching your chin to the floor…
Yes…I try but my lips keep sticking and I can't up…

Ok boys… she's stuck… take the car and her credit cards…

You know michelle your ass actually looks normal like this…

And when Barry doesn't do the dishes or finishes the chores, deliver meals to me… I make him do this for an hour without moving.. or I whip him..

And this is how we eat out of my garden… just like herbivores do…

My Barry is working on Green Energy and I am working on eating green, like the animals… we can all be grazers…

We are all sheep… Barry is working towards that… so I am going to set an example and be a sheep and eat from the earth like a sheep…

I try to get closer to the Earth… meditate like this…

My toof fell out… its my big toof… has to be here somewhere…

Oh My My…mmmhmmm… what kind wood is this?
Its plastic… wood Michelle..
Where does that tree grow?!

Oh My My…mmmhmmm… what kinda wood is this?
Its plastic… wood Michelle..
Where does that tree grow?!

Thats some high quality plastic… the Whitehouse needs new floors… where can I get some?

I still don't see myself!
You have to do more pushups before your image will appear…

Ok I am done!!!! Oprah doesn't make me do this!

Shine shine on the floor who's the biggest boar of all???

Whats wrong with my floor?
Well this floor hasn't had a shine in… my my ages… get my kit!

And in Africa this is where the women get like this and pump their ass up and down…
This is where hip hop came from… the fertility dance…

I can't do this real pushup! My ass is supposed to stick out…

Butches

One munches. One sucks.

Oh Yeah… thats down alright… mmmm hmmm… thats where he's goin'..

A true pushup Michelle means touching your chin to the floor…
Yes…I try but my lips keep sticking and I can’t push back up…

You do this Michelle and I promise you…the next Nobel Prize..

This is how my hubby got that nobly sumthin' prize… what if I do two?

Well how come this carpet is some berber and white???!

We use a lighter color, white, berber to show off your beautiful color tones…
Well I don't myself.. the carpet is white!

We use a lighter color, white, berber to show off your beautiful color tones…
Well I don’t see myself.. the carpet is white!

You found my childhood mattress!!! Where did you find it?

What are looking at?!
I was hiding from you!!!

I see a bit of silverbackin your ancestry

I see a bit of silverback in your ancestry Michelle

As a good Muslim wife, I'll never wear the pants in this marriage, but I obviously wear the shoulders.

Trust me Ellen…this will fix the economy

Good Christian Butches

^ correction: Good Chrishchin Butches

Historian: "And after the Obama presidency 3,000 years ago, women returned to walking on all fours."

Now see, Ellen, normally Barack would be face down underneath me…

Barry is going to quit kissing dictators asses and start kissing their feet, now down and kiss

Yes, Buh-rock positions himself like this every time Mr. Soros visits us!

Well Michele, I don't see any of those seeds you planted coming up do you?

So, does your carpet match the drapes Michele?

Well Michele, does this carpet kinda resember Barack's hair?

Are you sure this way faces Mecca?

This is how I take down Barry if he doesn't let me take Air Force One on my vacation.

I learned this in the Ghetto Ellen…

Arachnologist in the years 3,000:

"Yes, we believe these species of spiders are now extinct."

Museum guide in the year 2525:

"As you can see, these primitive females are in the mating position."

If Barry were a real black man then this is how high up I'd have to be.

Notice how much higher we had to build the stage to hold your weight?

Michelle, are you sure? I thought it was face-down-ass-up.

Well, normally … I have one of my 20 assistants do this for me!

Barak is always apologizing, someone has to wear the pants in this family!

I want to see some rug burn on your nose!

Gotta get in shape for those last 12 vacations.

This sure doesn't seem like a bow to me, Michelle

No more granola bars for you, Michelle

BUT I DON`T NEED MUSCLES , I CAN KICK HIS NARROW ASS RIGHT NOW !

See,told ya they wouldn't see the wires straining to lift your butt.

But Barry loves the shape of my ass.

Don't you just love running your fingers through a closely cropped carpet?

Pitching in to keep China in their place.

Slide back Michelle, I can't see your cleavage

Do we have to do it this way? Ellen, I'll CRUSH him…

Weird… this is how I breast fed my kids!