"Now, John…Don't act too gay…We don't want to let out our little secret!"
Luftwaffe One, the Fuhrer and no one of consequence.
"Mr. President, you really need to stop flapping your hands like a chicken every time you come down these stairs!"
"John, I need to keep this visit short — I have to get back to D.C, pick up Michelle, and fly to San Francisco for our date night."
"But I am saving money… I brought you along on the plane with me, didn't I?"
"Just think, John… If it hadn't been for a few hanging chads, this all could have been yours!"
"But John, if you had been elected in 2000, then I would have had to blame everything on you!"
You're right Barry, that IS a nice plane!
So when did you put the stripper pole in?
Ooops — please change the 8:49 AM caption to read 2004 — wrong election!
No, you don't have to worry about those guys saluting at the bottom of the stairs – I can ignore them all by myself.
Hey john,…why the long face?
Tap dancing? It's what I do best.
If I'm your running mate in '12, Barry, you can have all the free ketchup you want!!
Seeking advice from a real winner!
"Hahaha, John. And they said 'red is dead'!"
"John, my advice is this: Never admit to a lie!"
"Really, Barry, it's not a lie if you don't admit it?"
Turbulence? It sure as hell beats a swift boat!
"Oh, John, you're too funny but you should know by now you can't bullsh** and bullsh**er!"
"Barry, whatever it is just deny, deny, deny!"
Who's pants will go up in flames first??
In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.
Bonehead and Clod
Some have a car, I have a plane….. You drive next week to lunch
Barry don't you think that pink tie makes you look more gay than usual ?
Nobel Peace Prize, huh? I scammed 3 Purple Hearts and a silver star!
Barry, you really need to show me how to do that gay walk!
Can you snap your fingers too?
See Barry, I'm more flexible than I look.
Jive Turkey (BHO)
"Barry,,,,Baby Tomato is lagging behind Daddy Tomato. Daddy Tomato turns around, stomps on Baby Tomato and says: KETCHUP!" bwaahahahaha
"Pretty funny, John, but not nearly as funny as my Jobs Bill!"
"Funny, but someone cut me off the other day, and I yelled '***hole!' Suddenly, my voice-activated radio started playing one of your speeches. What's with that?"
Air Force One hocks two big loogies.
"Gee, Barry, I never knew a President could have so much fun."
"Oh sure, John. It's a laugh a minute."
Whatever the joke it is definitely on the people.
rewrite: Whatever the joke, it is definitely on the people.
The Court Jester entertains the King.
"That would be so cool, Barry. My wife could be your half-sister!"
JK: "My wife's company made $1.5 billion selling ketchup last year!"
BHO: "Big deal, my wife spent that much on her last vacation!"
Theresa may be a witch, but she doesn't tell me what to eat, and man is she loaded with dough!
john kerry reporting for duty-your bullshit barry!!
jesus christ john you didnt tell me there would be fried chicken and watermelon on the tarmac!!!!DAAAAAMMMMNNN!!!
Kenya Barry & Hanoi Kerry
(The best of the Democrat Party)
2 Doofuses and a plane moving Company. Established January 14 2013 at your service. We break it, someone else can replace it!
"No, John. Watch closely. Hands in front, then flap, flap, flap as you descend."
John, you're too slow… you have to Ketchup.
Flim Flam and Flip Flop
Lie all you want. Just don't get tied to Jane Fonda.
A stuffed shirt with an empty suit.
"Your jokes are every bit as good as mine!"
"The difference between us is that you can't tell what you stand for, and I can't admit what I stand for."
"Hey, Barry, don't worry about taxing the rich. My wife's 69 corporations are all in foreign countries!"
"Your wife is uglier than mine."
"No, your wife is uglier than mine."
"Barry, trust me, I know a thing or two about going after the rich. I marry them, and that takes care of my deficits."
" Pink looks great on you Barry..what'ya say a guy's night out, just you & me?"
The new odd couple.
Get your hand out of my pocket, John. You aren't president yet.
Yeh, John, I can get that Swiftboat Veterans ad off of YouTube, but it's gonna cost ya, buddy.
And so that's where I stashed that Solyndra money.
Great idea, Barry.
Obama: So tell me about these interns John.
Kerry: Oh yeah? You really want to try one? You're not afraid of Michelle?
Obama: All I have to do is keep her on vacation and she's happy.
So Barry… Two Muslims walk into a Bar!
two newest members of the mile high club.
Neither can dance.
Neither can sing.
But they have sold just about everything.
(unfortunately it's all been sold to China)
Numb Skull and Bones
Really? You just pissed all over the Constitution? Can I be your VP?
Some people are like Slinkys, useless until you push them down the stairs.
Like I how greased the skids for you back in '04, Barry?
Oh, those were skids you greased??
JK: "You're pretty happy for someone about to loose his job."
BHO: "I sure am cuz I get a free ride for the rest of my life!"
JK: I'm just a gigolo!
BHO: And I'm really gay!
JK: "I just love being a man-whore."
BHO: "Since I'm screwing the country does that make me a man-whore too?"
"Yes Barry, all I do is spread some catchup all over Teresa and she is ready to go…so how do you do it with Michelle?"
No, John, I just cup my hands in front of my crotch when they salute me, just like during that anthem-thingy.
Great Kerry, now lets go out and get more taxpayer's money
No problem Sen. Kerry, sorry this is the closest you'll ever get to Air Force one.
Let's flip for it! Heads, you buy lunch and tails we write it off as a necessary expense and let the taxpayers flip the bill!
No shit John? You can show me how to screw the taxpayers when I buy my first yacht?
Oh no John, taxpayers pay for the gas. Church's for lunch later? I'll drive
I lost a presidential election. Trust me, it's no big deal.
Barry, I picked this color tie for you!
Hey Barry, wanna find out where my tie ends??
"Tehaha…I know it, John! Cracks me up every time I get on or off this blue baby! Not only are the taxpaying sheep of America supplying my jet fuel…THEY get have to get strip-searched when THEY fly!"
“HaHaHa…I know, John! The same taxpaying sheep who just paid for our jet fuel have to get strip-searched when they fly!"
“HaHaHa…I know! The same taxpaying sheep who just paid for our jet fuel have to get strip-searched when they fly!”
A paper cut you say Barry? You know you can get a purple heart for that?! I'll show ya how I did it.
Barry I never knew the high grade cocain was kept on Air force 1…
"Suck up" & "I suck" debark Airforce One…
Goofus and Galavant
Yes, how silly Barry, you're not going to fall down the stairs and leave Joe in charge…. ha ha…
You know Barry, I've changed to a Republican – thank's to you, my odds are better that way!
Yes Barry, "Douchbag" is Hebrew for wonderful human being. Why are you asking?
John, the secret for 2016 for you is to get Acorn voting with you. Two million dead & repeat voters sure can secure the election.
"Barry, do you have any tips on winning the presidential elections?"
Barry, you look like you are about 3 cards short of a full deck.
Having a blast spending other people's money.
You can't raise new taxes on me…I haven't paid my old ones yet.
That's a damn good idea John. I'm sure Joe won't mind.
Hey! Don't worry. We can swing it. You put enough money in my election fund, Bidens out the door and you're in.