As we bow our heads in prayer, remember to give me thanks.
Hitler used his hands a lot when speaking too.
Let me explain how I'll make you richer by taking more of your money….
Your in goods hands, with All-powerful State.
"May the government bless and keep you, may the government make its face to shine upon you and give you peace…"
".. and now I pray that they would believe this B.S. just one more time…"
"May his days be few; may another take his place of leadership."
Empty space between the ears, empty space between the hands.
Speaking of empty spaces, anyone seen Joe?
Thank You Lord for me.
Welcoming a new flood of illegal aliens.
Barack's recites his beatitude:
Blessed are the poor, illegals and unions, for theirs is my kingdom of entitlements, redistributions and political favors.
Thank you Allah
America, I need your prayers. I will then decide which are answered…
"oh great,,,I can't read the teleprompter with my eyes closed"
Obama is wondering "what the hell do I do now?!"
Let me start off the State Of The Union address by saying assalamu alaikum.
Allah, give me the powers necessary to heal our planet, lower the sea levels, snuff out the fires, bring rain to a dry land and sponge it up from those who are soaked.
I must focus to blame Bush
The nations debt is only this big
"I am the redistribution and the strife."
"The One" blesses the masses at the AFL-CIO convention.
Obama attempts to raise the dead which he finds is much more difficult than raising the debt.
Rise Heels…No wait, it's Rise and be healed!
Sure hope Michelle pulls that fire alarm real soon. My arms are beginning to cramp.
I've got the whole world in my hands…
Quiick! Someone give me a rotten tomato!
Obama gives thanks to himself for the teleprompter
Give us a hug
All hail me.
Thou shalt covet.
Thou shalt envy.
Thou shalt be jealous.
And, oh yeah, whenever you can, be sure and bear false witness against the evil rich.
Blessed are the taxed for they support me
Where the hell is my speach?
I place upon you my blessings.
"I forgive you, America, of your many, many sins."
Now, everyone rise and pledge allegiance to me.
I had to bring a paper copy of my speech today because the teleprompter isn't working.
Do this in remembrance of me.
I now command the waters to rise and a bush to burn.
"I don't get it. Where's my stigmata?"
Michelle's ass is this freakin' wide. I am so ashamed…
I hid my horns and hooves for this job. See?
May it please Allah that these idiots will be blind when they read my Jobs Bill, as they were for Health Care, and pass it immediately without understanding what it really is. Allahu Akhbar!
Are you sure this isn't Biden's speech?
You may bow and genuflect now, and adore me as the Messiah.
I am your Messiah, I shall deliver you from Capitalism into the chains of Communism.
I have risen, so that you may adore me.
I am your Government. I shall fulfill your every need.
Whosoever believes in the government shall not perish but have everlasting life.
Our Father, who art in Heaven, please repair the teleprompter so I can continue my speech.
Blessed are the children, as they shall inherit the debt.
Come to me sheople of the United States. Vote for me agian. And rejoce as I enslave you to me. No longer do you work for selves for your own profet, but for me. Life is better this way you will see. You don't now how to spend your money allow me to spend it for you. And I will also burden you childen and grandchildren to me. Yes sheople it is all about me.
Did I get all the crap from my hands?
For the first time ever, Americans get to look down Obama's nose instead of up it.
Oh, no! George bought my balls!
Speak of the devil!
Our Father who art in . . . Kenya . . .
All rise and turn to hymn 347 and sing 'O Come All Ye Faithful'
"Oh come let us adooooooooore me, oh come let us adddooooore me, oh come let us adddooooooooooorrrrree meeeeee, Christ, I am….."
I ask for a moment of silence…or at least until my g*ddamn teleprompter recovers.
…for Mine is the kingdom, the power and they glory, now and forever. Amen
Beam me up Scotty…..and hurry!
BHO: "So, God. What's up?"
God: "It's not going to be you, that for damn sure!"
You've got to be kidding! bwaaahahaha
"Obama calling God. Obama calling God. Come in God."
"I sure love talking to myself."
For the first time in his life, Obama is at a loss for words.
And on the 8th day God created me.
And on the 2nd, 4th, 5th, 6th day I played Golf…
Who thought putting the teleprompter there was a good idea?? My adoring fans need to think I'm actually talking to them and concerned about them.
Let us all rise and pay homage to Socialism.
As my ol buddy Rev. Wright said often………
The amazing Obama will now levitate the economy, everything else has failed so why not
"On the 8th day, God created Me"
"I feel your pain, America..put your hands out this wide to show sincerity….shit! Who wrote that into my speech??!!?"
I am Obama. Your ruler. Yes, today begins a new order. Your lands, your possessions, your very lives, will gladly be given in tribute to me, Barrack Obama!
Brethrem, I am your Messiah, your elected Keeper …
For I am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me …
I shall covet your house, your wife, your male or female servant, ox or donkey, or anything else you may own … for I am a jealous Lord …
Behold, for I am Beelzebub, I shall turn your wine to vinegar and there shall be wailing in the land …
Behold, for I am Beelzebub, and I shall lay waste to your land …
Rise up and practice class-hatred and race-hatred as I command you …
WHERES THE FREAKING MONITOR !!!
WHERES THE FREAKING TELEPROMPTER ???
Joe! Not now!
"He who believes in me gets a free phone, a signed photo, CDs of my best speeches, and a subscription to Marxism for Dummies.
Who's the clown that put the Teleprompter on the floor?!
May Allah bless us, and keep us, and may God Damn America with my second term.
Verily I say unto thee, Praise be the Obamessiah, for he shall inherit your taxes
Ok choir, we are coming to the crescendo….remember your parts…now all together.. Barack Hussein Obama, hmmmm, hmmmmm, hmmmmm!
"There are times where — until Nancy Pelosi is speaker again — I'd like to work my way around Congress"