THe government will be banning cell phones because of their radiation. Instead, you will be forced to use air phones like the one I'm using now.

Obama uses his direct line to Allah for some on-stage consultation.

When the teleprompter malfunctions, Obama uses his direct line to Allah for backup.

Voices in the head…Voices in the hand…

"Hello?" "This is your conscience". Click.

Can you hear me now?

Just a second while I filter your question through my Obama-lator.

Obama demonstrates the new free Obamaphone. Cost to the American taxpayer $400 per person; no features, no buttons, no functionality, no problem!

Obama calls Hades to see if his room is ready.

(Mouthing the words) Monica…. call me.

Michelle – call my agent and tell him to get me out of this gig!

The Commie-in-Chief demonstrates just how easy he'll make it for illegal aliens to become U.S. citizens and registered voters prior to Election Day.

I'm calling in my own questions

Hey!! Hey Monica

Air phone for an air head.

Without a teleprompter, Obama panicks and tries to call for help.

So I called up Seal Team 6, told them where Bin Laden was, told them how many people were there, told them how to take him out, I mean heck, I practically did it all myself!

See?! All Americans have a direct line to the White House.

…so then I say to Mubarek, "NO, I said I'd KISS your ass"

Obama's Direct Line to Allah

How fitting. A phony president with a phony phone.

Obama pretending to be relavant.

Oh, hello Regis. No, I'm afraid I didn't screen that question in advance.

Ego to Alter Ego — Ego to Alter Ego … I can't remember my campaign promises …

So here I'm talking to Me, Myself, I, Ego and Alter Ego about all of our accomplishments on behalf of the American people …

Phoney

Hi, Venus? Is Michelle really from there? OK,OK, what's your return policy? I can start up NASA again tomorrow!

Can you hear me now? No, of course you can't because my words are meaningless!! hahahahhahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!

Oh, are we on air???

Hello, Timex? Do you have any models for limp-wristers?

If I don't have my teleprompter in front of me in under 60 seconds, I will fire my entire staff!!!!

Staff?? Hello??????…

Telemarketer In Chief

Tell you what, call me and ask if I care?

Sorry sir, I can't answer your question about the economy, I have to take this very important phone call.

Someone in the audience said "talk to the hand",sooo….

"Hang on. I got Joe on the Job Maker line."

Hang on, Jimmy Carter's calling with some more advice.

Let me give Reality a call and see what happens.

Oprah? Is that you?

Can you hear me now? Who care what you say

And for 2012 I promise you a free cell phone as a civil right!

No one is answering?

President Obama demonstrates the convenience of using his new international toll-free number to obtain U.S. citizenship.

So I dialed up Teddy and said, "Man, if you think it's hot in hell, you oughta be standing in my shoes right now…"

You're here illegally? No problema — call Auntie Zeituni and she'll tell you how to get a waiver of deportation granted.

left handed left wing socialist.

Don't accuse me of not listening to America!! See, this is my personl cell phone to the American public!

I told Al…in 40 years, we've taken them from global cooling to man-made global warming…hell, there is NOTHING we can't sell these morons.

So I called Farrakhan and said, Louie, we gotta beat them white folks BAD in the next election. Can you dig me up some dirt on Perry?

The symptoms…they appear early in some people.