My understanding of world affairs, the economy, the Constitution, and what America really needs from me…is about this much.

Hillary told me that after she did the "Bobbit" procedure on Bill, that the doctors only had this much to work with.

Anytime I speak expect about this much to be true….

When I looked in the mirror this morning, my wee willy was only still this big.

My butt plug is about this big…

"Hung like a flea?..no, mine is about this big,..NEXT questions?"

"Chubby Trumpka's chubby is no bigger than this ."

"Guess which digit Nancy likes to sit on."

"Mr. President,how close was your nose to the floor the last time you bowed to a Dictator"?

The president signifying his depth of love for the nation

"Mr. President,how close are you to being a Muslim"?

Mr. President, did you lie about being a Socialist?

The CIA has been working on a laser that can shrink people. The next time you see Hillary, she will be this size.

I'm crushing your head.