Unemployment problem? There's no one unemployment problem in Washington. We're doing just fine.
Are you serious? You really expected me to know what I was doing? I'm just here to play golf and spend your money!
Look, I know the poll numbers are bad…..but people have to remember, even God..err, Allah took 6 days to create the world.
How many times must I repeat myself? It's Bush's fault!
Well,because the peasants have the INTERNET now and we can't get away with lying like we used to.
I'm just as perplexed as anyone on the economy but hey..you guys elected me and I've never held a real job so…
What do you mean bankrupting America? We still got ink and paper left!
Yes, Michelle has back, but not like Kim Kardashian.
Look… this administration ONLY enforces laws that benefit me and my re-election bid, all the rest are meaningless.
Because I'm the Chosen One… that's why!
You didn't actually believe in all that hope and change bullsh*t did you?
"I have to pee but the Republicans said, No."
The recession is over, so please, STOP HATING ME!
"Taxation Without Representation? The election is over. I won."
I really am half white, that's George Bush's fault too…
What part of ME before the people don't you understand?
Look, I know employments bad and poverty is up so here's what I'm going to do.
Pass the dream act and repeal "don't ask don't tell".
So what if I bypass Congress and the constitution, with just a little more time, I'll be President for life!
Democrats don't want me campaigning with them now? Is it because I'm white?
…look, they told me this gig would be just like my community organizer job..who knew ?
Winner: Fastest Presidential Transformation from "IT" to "it"
No one told me my approval rating would be 'fundamentally transformed', too…
"Well, why don’t you love me like you used to do…"
Hey, don't forget I'm 'like a God'!
We had to get a special chair this wide for Michelle.
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